26 Jul
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a disorder characterised by an inflated sense of self-importance, a need for admiration and an absence of empathy.
While some people may display traits that appear narcissistic at different times of their lives such as in competitive environments, people with NPD have a more severe and pervasive personality style associated with a long-term pattern of abnormal behaviour.
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) published by the American Psychiatric Association (APA) offers a standard for the classification of mental disorders. Typical features of NPD are an underlying, fragile self-esteem with attempts to regulate emotions by grandiosity or seeking attention known as narcissistic supply.
‘Crazy-making’ behaviour
Narcissists wreak havoc in their relationships with a seemingly baffling array of manipulative tactics and ‘crazy making’ behaviour designed to extract narcissistic supply, or in the case of more sadistic narcissists, gain pleasure from seeing others in distress or pain.
Research suggests this character type is more likely to engage in counterproductive work behaviour and bullying when their self-esteem is threatened.
Those with the condition rarely seek treatment
NPD is thought to affect one percent of the population, however this figure may be conservative according to expert on narcissism, Dr Sam Vaknin given that those with the disorder don’t believe they have a problem and rarely seek treatment, with limited success for those who do.
According to Vaknin, the prevalence of the more extreme form of NPD, Antisocial Personality Disorder, commonly known as Psychopathy is more accurately reflected in the literature. “The reason is very simple,” he explains in an interview discussing how to deal with narcissists and psychopaths in the workplace, “Many psychopaths end up in jail, so there they are subjected to compulsory evaluations, assessments and sometimes therapy.”
Recognising the signs
Identifying the signs of narcissism in the workplace is the first step to restoring balance or regaining your health if you have become the target of this pathological personality type writes HEATHER HAMILTON, CAREER ADVISER, TRUEYOU CAREER.
There are a number of common behaviours and symptoms when it comes to determining whether someone may be a narcissist, but not all of these have to be present. Here are 10 telltale signs you should look out for:
1. Toxic work environment
One of the first signs a narcissistic manager is at work is a bad atmosphere which permeates the organisation. Employees will experience high stress levels and low morale as narcissists preserve a climate of fear and enjoy arousing negative emotions to keep everyone else feeling insecure and inferior, so they can feel powerful.
2. One-way conversations
The classic, overt narcissist described in the DSM displays a haughty, arrogant demeanour and a lack of reciprocal interest in others resulting in painfully one-sided conversations. A narcissistic co-worker or manager may talk endlessly about themselves while intermittently name-dropping to communicate prestige to those unable to escape a conversational headlock.
3. Pathological envy
Envy is indicated as one of the diagnostic criteria for NPD and is the core emotion at the heart of the pathology according to Abdul Saad, a Clinical Psychologist with Vital Mind Psychology. Motivated by a deep sense of inner lack, narcissists belittle and devalue the positive traits they see in others to validate their own superiority, Saad explains. “If we can understand that, then we can understand why narcissists are indefatigable – their derision, their hostility, their hatred, their contempt knows no end.”
4. Gaslighting
The psychological term gaslighting originates from the 1944 film, ‘Gaslight’ in which a woman’s perception of reality is distorted by her husband who insists she is mistaken when she notices the dimming gas lights. When narcissists feel their importance is under question, they experience narcissistic injury and may tell obvious lies to lead you into an abusive cycle of denial, blame and more false claims. By gaslighting, narcissists seek to elicit from you a constant supply of anxiety and self-doubt and gain the power to grant you approval, security and respect.
Scene from Gaslight (1944)
5. Projection
Projection is a defence mechanism in which unwanted feelings are displaced onto another person. A sure sign you are dealing with a toxic individual is their inability to take responsibility for their shortcomings or destructive behaviour. Narcissists are not interested in self-improvement and instead are hardwired to project their dysfunction and insecurities onto their victims. Empathic individuals who tend to project their empathy and compassion onto others, may find themselves accepting the blame for everything that is wrong with the narcissist who defies all logic when held to account by playing the victim.
6. Exploiting weaknesses
More cunning than the overt narcissist according to Narcissistic Personality clinical expert, Dr Martinez-Lewi, is the covert narcissist who is masterfully clever at concealing his or her malicious, dark traits. Seemingly self-effacing, covert narcissists may wear a mask of vulnerability or identify as a caretaker who takes care of everyone else except themselves. A closet narcissist can appear to be psychologically grounded and a good listener as they data-mine their targets for the sole purpose of learning their weaknesses and draining them dry.
7. Triangulation
Triangulation is a manipulation tactic where one person will not communicate directly with another person. This is a favourite tool of an emotional manipulator who will draw in an accomplice to gang up against a third party. Recruiting allies or flat out bullying when taken to the extreme is used as a means of controlling their victims and how they are perceived which brings us to the next sign of a narcissist at work.
8. The smear campaign
By spreading rumours or half-truths, narcissists can incite innocent people to inflict abuse by proxy, provoking a reaction in the target to paint a false narrative that the abuser wants to create. In this way the psychologically impoverished narcissist wins the sympathy and support of others and maintains their narcissistic matrix of control.
9. The silent treatment
The silent treatment is a form of emotional abuse often employed by those with narcissistic tendencies to punish the victim for a perceived ego slight or setting healthy boundaries. Targets of narcissists often possess high empathy and strong conflict resolution skills, however any attempts to resolve misunderstandings will be met with silence or hostility with the intention of drawing a reaction from their victims.
10. Sabotage
Energised by chaos and without conscience, narcissists see no reason not to sabotage an employee or co-worker and will find insidious methods to undermine their competence and performance. Victims find themselves engaged in a game of psychological warfare with skilled manipulators who are more preoccupied with thwarting the progress and happiness of their target than achieving the goals of the organisation.
So you’re dealing with a narcissistic personality. What next?
Whether your encounters are professional or personal, prolonged exposure to narcissistic abuse can be highly damaging to your mental and physical well-being. Recognising that you are dealing with a pathological personality is the key to moving forward and leading the life you deserve.
Practice good self-care and seek support
The standard advice if you have become the main target of a narcissist is limited or no contact, however there are a number of strategies you can put in place while you consider your options. Protect yourself by practising good self-care to build up your reserves, keep an emotional distance and seek out the support you need.
If you are feeling overwhelmed, talk to your GP or work with a counsellor with a deep knowledge of narcissism who can help you reclaim your personal power. Speaking with a lawyer at your nearest Free Legal Advice Centre can also help you gain perspective and a clearer understanding of your legal rights.
Heather Hamilton is a career guidance practitioner with an Institute of Guidance Counsellors (IGC) accredited qualification in career guidance counselling. If you would like to explore your employment, education or training options, get in touch to discuss your career goals or book your career guidance consultation.